Meet Naturalista Yasmin!

A Naturalista is someone that rocks her kinks, curls, and coils with confidence! Naturalistas are not afraid to live outside the box.  No matter if it’s sharing tips on the latest hair products or giving a fellow natural a compliment, naturalistas empower one another.  As an act of empowerment, I  want to feature fellow naturals. (details soon about how to be featured).

Meet Fellow Naturalista Yasmin!

How long have you been natural and what made you decide to go natural?

Yasmin has been natural for 7 years (her whole life). -mommy

Did you big chop or transition to natural?

Neither, she was born this way. -mommy

Describe your hair texture?

Yasmin has THICK hair! I would guess it’s about a 4A. -mommy

What is your current length and what is your goal length?

My hair is as long as my butt, I want Rapunzel hair! -Yasmin

What is your favorite thing about being natural?

It gets long when it’s straight. -Yasmin

What is your go-to hairstyle?

Yasmin is VERY tender headed so we normally do ponytails. -mommy

What are some of your must have hair products?

Spray that gets tangles out. -Yasmin

Describe your wash day routine?

You wash my hair in the tub. -Yasmin


9 Things ALL Young Mothers Should Do!


  1. Live Unapologetically!- People are always going to pass judgement.  What can you do about it?  Nothing!  Just live your life to the best of your ability.  Stop apologizing for not living up to standards created by society or people that can’t even live up to  them their damn selves!  Never let anyone shame you for being a single mother, a young mother, or any other type of mother.  Hold your head up high and be the best mother you can be!
  2. Don’t Be Ashamed to Ask For Help!- Raising a child is not a one-person job; it truly takes a village to raise a child.  Receiving help (financial or any other type) does not make you any less of a parent.
  3. Reevaluate Your Circle!- Take a good look at the people that you keep around you! Everyone in your circle should have a similar mindset! Your focus should be to give your children a better life! People who are not living a positive, progressive life, have no place in your circle!
  4. Set Goals and Dream Big!- It’s important to remember that you can still achieve whatever it is that you want to achieve! A lot of times we associate becoming a mother as a hindrance, believing we can no longer accomplish the goals we had before! That is the furthest thing from the truth. It was not until after I had my daughter that I received my degree and was able to go on to grad school. Mothers should set goals and believe the sky is the limit.  The key is to work hard while prioritizing. Nothing can stop us!
  5. Don’t Forget That You’re Still Young!- There is a lot of responsibility that comes with being a mother. When you bear the responsibility of keeping a small human alive, it is easy to forget about yourself.  Remember that you are still young!  Hangout with your peers and keep up with current trends. Your first priority should always be your child(ren), but it is important to remain true to who you are.
  6. Find a Mentor!- Being a mother while working to achieve your goals can be challenging; it’s hard to figure out exactly where to start.  Find someone that has been where you are now and has accomplished goals that are important to you.  A mentor can provide you with direction and save you from making mistakes that they made in their journey.  If you do not have a mentor, continue to work hard and a mentor will find you.
  7.  Set an Example!- Strive to be the person that you want your child(ren) to be.  Your child(ren) are always watching!
  8. Support One Another!- Build a support network with other mothers.  Encourage one another.  It is very helpful to have someone to talk to that is in a similar situation as yourself.  It is fun to exchange parenting ideas, have playdates, or just someone to vent to.
  9. Don’t Compare Yourself to Others!- Never measure your success or self-worth by comparing yourself to others!  For one, people only allow you to see what they want you to see.  You never know another person’s true reality.  Also, everyone has a different journey.  We are all at different places of our journies, but what truly matters is the end result. Often times it can be helpful to take a social media break.  This will allow you to focus on yourself and not always be confronted with the outside personas that others put out.

All This Hair, So Little Time; A Regular Girl’s Wash and Go

Although I’ve been natural for 2.5 years, I do not claim to be a natural hair expert. But I do get a lot of questions about what products I use in my hair.  I decided to do a short post about what products I use and how I manage my hair.

Wash, Condition, Deep Condition:

First things first, I wash/co-wash, condition, and deep condition my hair while in the shower. I test out different brands, but I do have a few favorites: As I am co-wash, Aussie Moist conditioner, and Eden Body Works deep conditioner. wet hair

As-I-Am-Coconut-Cowash-Cleansing-Conditioner-16-Ounce-4aussie moisteden-bodyworks-jojoba-deep-conditioner


Once my hair is washed and conditioned, I section my hair into four sections and detangle them using a wide-tooth comb. Once my hair is detangled I moisturize it using the LOC method.

The L.O.C Method (Leave-in, Oil, and Cream)




oilcurl cream


Again, I don’t always use the same products but these are some of my favorites: Eden Body Works leave-in conditioner, Manelove Seal the Deal Avocado Mint Oil (I love this stuff!), and Shea Moistures Kids Curling Butter Cream.  Be sure to check out other Manelove products!  They are 100% natural and hand made! ManLove <~click the link!!


With my hair in sections, I first apply a liberal amount of leave-in conditioner to each section.  Next I seal in all the moisture by applying oil to each section. I finish off with the curl cream.


Once the moisture is locked in, I make sure my curls are defined.  I do this by using my Denman brush. I basically brush sections of my hair, making sure the products are evenly distributed  throughout my hair. Watch those curls pop!


Something Extra:

When I want my hair more defined and less frizzy, I use a gel or curling custard.  As I said before I do not always use the same brand.  Some of my favorites are Hello Tight Curly Gel, As I Am Curl Jelly, and Eco Styler Gel.



Hurry Up and Dry:

During the summer I like to let my hair air dry.  When it’s too cold I bring out the blow dryer! I blow dry my hair on the warm setting using the diffuser attachment (to keep my hair from getting frizzy).


All Done!



If you are anything like me, then you are no stranger to socially awkward conversations such as…

Stranger: Do you have any brothers or sisters?

Me: I have two brothers.

Stranger: Are they older or younger?

Me: One older; one younger..

Stranger: Ohhhhh.. so you’re a middle child!


Stranger: Do you have any kids

Me: Yeah, I have a daughter.

Stranger: When are you going to have another; you don’t want her being an only child

Conversations such as those drew me to researching Alfred Adler’s studies on birth order.  Adler theorized that the order in which one is born into a family, directly influences one’s personalty.  Below are some characteristics that Adler theorized to be direct results of birth order.

Oldest Child

Serious, Goal-oriented , Follows the rules, High Self-esteem, Desire to help, protect, and lead others, Organized, Jealous, High-achieving, Competitive

Middle Born Child

Feels as though they do not belong, Fewer Pictures in Family Album, Lack of Drive, Natural Mediators , Avoid Conflict, Loyal , Have many friends, Take it or Leave it Personality , Often Lonely, Seekers of Justice

Youngest Child

Party Animal, Entrainer, The Baby, Outgoing, Charmer, Selfish, Manipulative, Irresponsible, Social

Only Child

Characteristics of First Born or Youngest Child

Exhibit A; My Brother’s and I

chasmin law school pic

My family is the personification of Adler’s birth order theory!  First, you have my older brother pictured in the middle holding is his Georgetown Law Juris Doctor degree (need I say more?).  My older brother is very competitive but he is also the one person that I am able to count on when I need advice or help.  Next, lets skip to my younger brother.  I think that may be the only outfit he brought on our trip to Georgetown.  He is always ready for a good time or a laugh.  He is usual not the one I depend on to do something responsible, but some of the best days of my life were spent laughing with him.  Lastly you have me! I am such a middle child that I am awkward at describing myself.  Not really sure where I fit in; I’ve seen very few baby pictures of myself.  If it were not for me being the only girl, I would probably get forgotten a lot.

The point of this post was to reflect on how simple things that are beyond our control ,such as how many siblings we have, can play a role in who we become.  Although it is annoying when strangers lecture me on the woes of Yasmin being an only child, it is important for me to reflect on how my parenting style and the environment I place her in will contribute to the woman she becomes.  No matter if we are the oldest, youngest, middle, or only child it is important to keep in mind that we are all unique individuals.  We often times get comfortable with being a product of our environment that we confine ourselves to the box that life has put us in.  Example, my older brother was always the smart one; that was his niche.  One day I read a study that said siblings tend to be within two IQ points of one another.  I began to think “hey, what’s stopping me from being smart?”.  I began to apply myself, I read books, I exposed myself to new things and in my eyes I became smart. We can not always control the environment we grow from, but one thing I hope I will instill into Yasmin is, “You may be an only child, but that does not mean that you can not be generous!”.

Peace of Mind


Being a Mother, a full-time graduate student, and working full-time, often times can get just a tad bit hectic.  It is easy for me, like many others, to feel overwhelmed. At times it is very important for me to take a couple of steps back, breathe, and remember a few key concepts that I use to keep me focused and sane (well actually 5). Below is just a few of my core values that keep me afloat in life; I am curious if anyone else has similar systems or thoughts on how to keep peace of mind throughout hectic times as well.

Five Steps to Gaining Peace of Mind

  1. Express Gratitude: Often times we are so focused on our next move and what we want to work towards next that we often forget about the things that we already have today.  I understand that you want to be a millionaire but be grateful for what is in your bank account today.  Maybe you’re feeling down because you don’t have a relationship like Jay and Bey or Will and Jada; feel grateful for the family and friends that you do have in your corner. Love comes in many forms. Gratitude is loving the blessings that you already have and understanding there are more to come.
  2. Remain Positive: There is no limit to the impact that having a positive attitude can have on your life. Positivity breeds more positivity.  Keep in mind that you are what you attract.  Happiness is a choice and choosing to remain positive is the first step towards making that choice.
  3. Find Purpose: We were not born to just go to work and pay bills!  There is so much more to life.. right? Find something you love; work hard at it until you succeed.  Set goals, help others, and get involved.  When you find something that you love, you are good at, you believe in, and allows you to give back to others… you have found purpose.
  4. Self-Care:  We’ve all heard the sayings “I’ll sleep when I die” or “Always grinding”; I’m sorry but I love my sleep!  Often times we feel as if we have to always be moving in order to be successful, or that we must always be taking care of others before ourselves.  If we are always tired, we can not put forth maximum effort to our own successes or care for those around us.  This is why it is important to take time out for ourself.  Do something that makes you feel good— go to the spa, a lunch date with a friend, take a road-trip, or get a full eight hours of sleep. Self-care should be specific to you, see what works best for you. Once you have explored a few self-care practices, create a self-care schedule detailing how often you will do each practice. Once you designate time for yourself you will feel more refreshed and be more attentive to those around you.
  5. Self-Reflection: Sometimes it can be beneficial to do some serious self-reflection. Self-reflection can be done through meditation or serious thought about your own character, motives, and actions. This is important because when we gain a greater understanding of ourselves we are more conscious about certain things that may trigger specific emotions, behaviors, and or thoughts in us. Journaling can be a great way to self-reflect.  Write down your thoughts each day and see how much you learn from yourself.


Flat Hair

disney princess

People often ask me the question “What made you decide to go natural?”.  My response… flat hair!  “Flat hair” is what Yasmin used to call hair that is straight.  She would tell me all the time that she did not like her hair because it was fluffy and not flat.  One Halloween Yasmin actually made a remark that she was not a real Disney princess because Disney princesses had flat hair but her hair is fluffy.  I would tell Yasmin all the time she had beautiful hair then she would just reply with “nah, I want flat hair”.

Although Yasmin did not like her own hair, she loved my straight relaxed hair. Yasmin would always say that she wished she had flat hair just like mine.  As I would watch Yasmin admire my hair I began to wonder  “how could I tell Yasmin to love her own hair when I am constantly chemically altering and using harsh heat on my own hair”.  I started to wonder did I really love my hair and what was wrong with the texture that God had given me?  At this time I began to experiment.  I stopped getting relaxers (although I relapsed a couple times).  I rocked braids, weaves, and curls.  Not everyone had positive things to say about my transition but it was something that I wanted to do for myself in hopes to show Yasmin that I truly loved myself and she should too.

A year later, I decided it was time to cut all the relaxed hair off and start fresh!  I still remember Yasmin looking at me like “wow.. she has fluffy hair too!”.  It made me feel good that I was no longer just preaching to Yasmin about self-love, but I was living it as well!



yaya and chat

Welcome to my blog!  My blog is a space that I use to reflect on all the epiphanies that I have stumbled upon.  These epiphanies often encompass: life lessons, thoughts on natural hair, new foods, feelings about relationships, and so much more. But what these epiphanies all seem to have in common is that they are Yasmin inspired.  We put in so much time analyzing how we should be influencing our children but how often do we reflect on the precious ways that they influence us!